We got to the airport and my bags were overweight. Holy crap… I went to Africa and didn’t have overweight bags, but apparently I overpack when going on a cruise. Whatever. Faith helped me reorganize (that’s why I go places with her) and we checked in our bags.
Danel was late -or on time, depending on how early we debate people are supposed to arrive before flights- so when she came, we’d had a few minutes to sit by ourselves and that’s never good. Idle time and impatient adventurers makes for a lot of giggling and stupid jokes, but it was fun times.
Speaking of idle time... Joy and I nearly shot Faith. She was so excited that she couldn’t stay quiet… we listened to her nonstop commentary on half of a Vogue magazine before Danel arrived. Faith would say things like “omigosh this girl looks so beautiful” regarding some nutritionally deprived teenager who looked like you could snap her in half like a breadstick -something she obviously has never had the privilege of eating- and Joy would gasp with laughter as I looked at the picture in question and say “she just looks hungry to me”.
So… this is the way our hour or so of waiting for the plane to depart went. It was even funnier to have Danel along as she provided new entertainment for us as well. Purchasing $16 worth of snacks and diet soda from airport gift shops before ever leaving was pretty darn awesome to watch. I was sure she’d leave with the whole store, but alas she knew even if her pockets were deep, her bladder wasn’t. Sorry, Danel.
Our plane was so small it was like “Rescuers Down Under” sized. Flying on the wing of a seagull small… in comparison to normal jets, I guess. We walked down the airport ramp onto the ptarmack and then up into the plane via little stairs. Thank you Horizon Air for making me feel like a princess embarking on my own private jet… and thank you flight attendant for reminding upon my entry to the tiny cabin where you were stooping over to greet me, that that’s just not my reality. We got onboard and a large and loudly unpleasant man was yelling at the stewardess that his air conditioning was broken. She did her best to fix his problem as Danel and Faith and Joy and I found our assigned seats.
Faith and Joy found their seats, but a man was sitting in one of theirs and was obviously confused with assigned seats. Faith clued him in and he gave a very heartfelt apology in an AUSTRALIAN ACCENT and went to the front of the plane to find his seats, where those people warmly welcomed he and his beautiful accent. I glared at Faith as his hearty happy laughter in the front of the plane was drowned out by Mr. Loud and Obnoxious sitting behind us. Faith is so dense sometimes… ;o)
The stewardess informed us that there was only one bathroom on board - all the way in front, second door on the right - SECOND door on the right, she repeated. I wondered why and then realized the THIRD door on the right was the Captain’s deck and imagined that Horizon Air probably has a lot more fake terrorist scares than larger airlines since the bathroom door looks very similar to the Captain’s deck one. Can you imagine Mr. Loud and Obnoxious getting taken out by the three stewardesses as he starts banging on the Captain’s deck door thinking it was the bathroom? Good grief. Our biggest worry was Joy making it through the flight but she did great under the influence of two Dramamine tablets. She was a bit out of it the whole day after that though.
Danel was laughing pretty much nonstop as I was making friends with everyone on the plane that we met (except Mr. Loud and Obnoxious), so imagine her delight when my next friend became Mr. Matrix in front of me. He was a good natured man with sunglasses that made him look like he was Morpheus from the Matrix. It was awesome! When our flight was over and I had Faith snap a picture of Danel and I, he randomly stuck his head in our picture and thus began my random adventures with strange men.
We arrived in LA after what seemed like the shortest flight ever (maybe when you‘re that small, you get shorter faster routes since all the cool kids are flying in their 747s up higher). I asked the stewardess for permission to disembark after everyone else so that I could take a picture exiting the plane. She laughed and agreed, so I have pictures to prove my desired reality of a Princess lifestyle on the steps of “my“ airplane. Mr. Matrix laughed and watched our photo session long after his luggage was ready for him and Danel got a kick out of that.
As we got our luggage and hoofed it across half of LAX to where we could catch a taxi to the Pier we needed to be at, Danel said in a shocked voice “I don’t think I can remember the last time I carried my own luggage.” We realized the same was true for all of us and we’re happy to acknowledge that whenever we’re around the men in our lives we ARE Princesses. We don’t need no stinking cruise! ;o)
Aaaaand then we got the ship.
Now… when Faith giggles, it’s usually stop and go… like a chipmunk with hiccups… but this time I thought there was something medically wrong with our chipmunk. I don’t think she stopped giggling for the entire half hour that we checked in, took a picture, crossed the boat ramp and entered the boat. It went like this
“maam, this is your room key”
“hehehe. Thank you”.
“maam, let me take your luggage from you”
“hehehehehe. I’M GOING ON A CRUISE!!!”
“yes maam, you are. Will you need me to show you to your room?”
“no. hehehe. I’m going to FIND IT MYSELF. It’s an adventure!! Heehee”
… and so on and so forth. Omigosh. I hadn’t ever been on a cruise either, but going with her made the experience oh so much more exciting. Her smile was blinding, people.
We had arrived on the cruise ship, and no one even needed to ask if we’d ever been on a cruise ship before. Faith’s giggle alone was the answer to that question.
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